


No, Sylvain, Dimitri is not a vampire

by TheDoctorIsIcecube



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Vampire, Friendship, M/M, Slow Burn, Vampires
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-29
Updated: 2019-09-29
Packaged: 2020-11-07 18:47:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,625
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20822090
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheDoctorIsIcecube/pseuds/TheDoctorIsIcecube
Summary: When Sylvain takes in a random half-dead stranger living in a suspicious, dilapidated house at the edge of town, Felix is suspicious. Where it goes from there is mostly to do with Felix being hopelessly gay....though Dimitri is still pretty suspicious.





	No, Sylvain, Dimitri is not a vampire

“Come on!” Sylvain tugged at Felix’s coat sleeve, pulling him towards the house on the outskirts of town.

“Goddess, why am I even here?” he wondered, mostly to himself. Definitely to himself, because Sylvain had plenty of ‘good’ answers to that question.

“Because you wuv me,” Sylvain said, a wicked grin on his face. Felix scowled. “Because we’re best friends forever?”

“Because you’ll probably get arrested or hurt if I’m not there,” he said. Sylvain winced, but he took the point. Probably because exactly that would happen (and had happened in the past) if Felix wasn’t around.

“Okay fair enough, but still. This is going to be fun. People keep saying they’ve seen someone living in the old house, but they’ve only seen him at night. It’s your classic ghost story, we have to go investigate.” It would probably be nothing, like all of the other times Sylvain had gone chasing wild rumours, but he could never resist the lure of something like this. Besides, it gave him some very interesting things to talk about with the girls. 

Felix couldn’t help but admit he was maybe the tiniest bit curious, too. This town was boring, and it was full of boring people. He had to make his own fun, or at least get Sylvain to fuck something up spectacularly so he could have fun. That was as good a reason as any to tag along. They’d been doing this sort of thing for years, and really, it had never been boring even once. Occasionally painful, or embarrassing, or very stupid, but never ever boring. Sylvain was good like that. 

“Okay,” Sylvain said, looking at the house. “I’m going in through the window. How does that sound?”

“Sylvain, the door is right there,” he said. The door was shaky on its hinges, and ramming it with his shoulder would definitely open it up. Going in through the window would leave one of them impaled on broken glass.

“You have no imagination,” Sylvain grumbled, wandering up to the door and giving it a good shove. It creaked open with a swirl of dust, revealing a dark hallway. Felix raised an eyebrow, waiting for Sylvain to enter first. “Ladies first?” he said with a wink.

Felix punched him in the arm and went inside. Sylvain probably just didn’t want to admit that he was scared. He had no good reason to be, because this was just an old, abandoned house, and it didn’t look like it had even been used for drugs. He heard Sylvain step in after him, and the old door creaked half-shut behind them. 

“Creepy in here,” Sylvain remarked. Felix heard a soft click, and then torchlight flooded the hallway from what he assumed must be Sylvain’s phone. He was never well-prepared enough to bring an actual torch with him. 

“For you, maybe,” he said, but internally he definitely agreed. It was kinda creepy. There was something...ugh, he didn’t know. It wasn’t like he hadn’t explored abandoned buildings with Sylvain before. They were always a bit weird, but this one felt different. And he didn’t know why.

“I know you’re spooked by this place too, Felix, I can hear it in your voice. Can’t hide anything from me!” He was joking around, but Felix knew that they were both slightly regretting their decision to come in here. “Hey- did you see something move just now? Over there, by that door!”

“You’re imagining it,” he said, keeping his eyes very firmly fixed on the door. And the surrounding area. And the whole room, and every entrance and exit to it. The house looked...like someone lived here. Yet it was so clearly abandoned. But Felix could see a footprint in the dirt ahead of them. 

Then, a few things happened in quick succession. Firstly, someone jumped out of the room they’d both been staring at, and someone screamed. Maybe it was Sylvain. Maybe it was Felix. Either way, what happened next was that Sylvain dropped his phone, sending a beam of light spinning through the air and then going out as the phone hit the floor. All Felix saw on the person who’d jumped out was a flash of blond hair and pale skin, and then the sound of him running up the staircase in the centre of the hallway.

“...woah,” Sylvain said. His voice was shaking slightly. “Did you just scream?”

“I think that was you,” he said. Sadly, his voice was also shaking. He wasn’t fooling anyone. He fished his own phone out of his pocket and turned the torch on, finding Sylvain’s phone shattered on the floor. 

“Aw…” Sylvain picked up his phone, turning it on and wincing as he studied the cracked screen. “At least it still switches on, I guess.” He turned to look up the stairs. “So...do we follow the ghost?” 

“What the fuck?” he asked, and Felix was not ashamed to admit his voice cracked a little there. “Come on Sylvain, you can’t be that much of an idiot. A man just jumped out at us from the darkness. I’m not fucking going up there.”

“Was it a man?” Sylvain peered up the stairs. “I think I saw long hair. What if it’s a woman, Felix? What if she needs our help?” Felix couldn’t tell how serious he was, but clearly Sylvain wasn’t ready to give up just yet, because he turned on the flickering light from his broken phone torch and stepped towards the stairs. 

Felix was not a coward. He didn’t easily get scared. He also wasn’t an idiot. But it seemed like Sylvain was, and two sets of fists were probably better than one in this situation. So he sighed, just so Sylvain knew exactly how pissed off he was, and followed him up the stairs.

“This is ridiculous,” he grumbled as they walked. “We’re going to get stabbed in some old fuckin’ house by some homeless guy, just because there’s a tiny chance that a pretty girl might be in danger.” Still, his protestations didn't stop him from advancing up the stairs, each creaking step filling him with a little more tension. 

“Did you say something, Felix?” Sylvain asked, turning on his heel to face Felix with a huge, stupid grin on his face.

“Keep your eyes in front of you, dumbass,” he shot back. Most importantly, he thought, keep the torch in front of them both. He did not want to get caught by surprise a second time.

Reaching the top of the stairs, Felix caught Sylvain’s arm, pulling him closer. Just for safety. They weren’t going to get split up like some idiots in a horror movie. He pointed into a large, dark room- a bedroom, perhaps?- with an open door, noticing that the door was still swinging ever so slightly. 

“Hello?” Sylvain called. His voice was still shaking a little. Felix couldn’t blame him, but he was going to absolutely rib him about it when they were safe. “We, uh, we’re not here to hurt you or anything! We were just concerned!” Felix didn't want to point out that perhaps their mysterious companion was the one who might want to hurt them. But the thought was there, nonetheless. 

There was a faint rustling sound from inside the room. Felix tensed, ready to sprint away at top speed and drag Sylvain with him if necessary. But instead, Sylvain pressed further forward, standing in the doorway of the room. Felix reluctantly followed. “Oh yikes,” Sylvain said, and it took a moment of looking over his shoulder for Felix to see what he meant.

Hunched over in the corner of the room was a man wearing a ragged black coat. He was looking at them both with...Felix couldn’t even work out what the look was meant to be. But it sent a shiver down his spine.

“We should leave,” he said, pulling on Sylvain’s arm. Sylvain did not move. Instead, he lifted his phone and shone the light right into the mysterious man’s face. He flinched, lifting an arm to shade his eyes. Felix resisted the urge to punch his idiot friend. “Why did you do that? Idiot.”

“...I wanted to check if he was a vampire,” Sylvain said.

“What.” That was the only reply Felix could think of. “Sylvain, it’s artificial light. And vampires don’t even exist. Stop being an idiot and just help him if you’re so fixated on this ‘I’m not here to hurt you’ thing.”

“Fine.” Sylvain lowered his phone light, pulling away from Felix and slowly approaching the man. Felix stayed a few steps behind him, still ready to jump to his friend’s defence if necessary. “Uh...hey. Are you okay?” 

The man grunted. “Go away,” he said. His voice was somehow deeper than Felix was expecting.

“Do you even have any food out here?” Sylvain asked. “Actually, is this place even connected to the water mains? Sorry, I’m not buying it. I can give you a hand if you need something. Like, uh...a shower, I guess.”

The man narrowed his eyes at Sylvain, and for a long moment Felix thought that he was going to pull out a knife or something. Instead, he lurched to his feet, regarding both of them with intense blue eyes. “Who are you? No one comes to this house.” 

“Oh, uh, about that,” Sylvain said with a nervous laugh. “We thought no one was here. Abandoned houses are pretty creepy and I like taking photos of them and stuff. We weren’t here for you or anything, don’t worry about it.”

“You...wanted to take photos.” The stranger seemed like he didn't really buy that, but Sylvain kept up a slightly hopeful smile anyway. “Hmph. Who’s your friend?” That intense gaze suddenly flicked to Felix, and he found himself shifting uncomfortably on the spot. 

“An overprotective prickly bastard,” Sylvain said, shooting Felix one of his winning smiles. Felix just glared back at him before returning the full force of his gaze to the man, just in case he decided to make a move. He didn’t trust him. “His name is Felix. I’m Sylvain.”

“Dimitri,” the man said, still not taking his eyes off of Felix. It was really quite unnerving. “I may take you up on your offer of a shower. And perhaps...something to eat.” The way he said that sent a shiver down Felix’s spine, although he couldn’t pinpoint why. 

Felix opened his mouth to protest because he was not, under any circumstances, welcoming some man who had just broken Sylvain’s phone into the house they shared. But then Sylvain smiled and turned around, practically skipping out of the room. Damn his bleeding heart and his kindness. He couldn’t exactly turn this Dimitri away when Sylvain was being kind.

He scowled, finally breaking the staring contest he had going on with Dimitri and stalking out of the room. He could hear heavy footsteps behind him, indicating that their new house guest was definitely following. Great. He stopped after a couple of seconds, letting Dimitri pass him before he continued. He wanted to keep an eye on him.

“You seem like a good friend, Felix,” the man said, and Felix didn’t trust the lightness that had entered his tone. He sounded so sincere. It was such a huge change from the way he’d been acting only a few minutes before.

“Hmph,” he said, watching Sylvain push open the old house’s front door and hold it, looking expectantly at the two of them as they walked down the stairs. His friend was too kind-hearted for his own good. Felix wasn’t going to trust this stranger, no matter how nice he was suddenly being. 

“Thank you,” Dimitri said when he walked through the door. Sylvain smiled back at him. Felix scowled. “I understand your reservations, Felix,” he continued. “I am not exactly the most harmless looking of figures.” Goddess, why did he talk like a knight out of a fairytale? Felix wasn’t five years old.

“You live in a nightmare house, running around in the dark like...like some sort of vampire.” That’s what Sylvain had called him, and it was ridiculous enough to get his point across, Felix hoped. “You’re lucky that Sylvain is nicer than me.” 

“Do you really think I’m a vampire?” Dimitri asked, and his face was such a picture of innocence that Felix wanted to say yes.

But he wouldn’t, because vampires didn’t exist and he was not an idiot. Not like Sylvain. “Of course not,” he said with a scoff. “It was a point of comparison. Would you rather I say that you run around in the dark like a murderer?”

“Not really,” Dimitri said lightly. He was so smooth about everything now that they were out of that creepy house. Felix rolled his eyes, speeding up to catch up with Sylvain.

“I still don’t trust that guy,” he murmured. “Make sure you lock your bedroom door so he can’t get in and stab you in your sleep.” 

“You’re so paranoid, Felix,” Sylvain said, throwing an arm over Felix’s shoulders. Felix frowned, but let him stay. “Look,” he said, lowering his voice a little. “His hands were shaking when we entered the room and he looks like he’s been on his own for ages. I bet he’s stick thin under that coat.”

“Yeah, so he’s a homeless person. He’s still weird. He could still secretly be a murderer.” Sylvain was giving him a Look, the sort of Look that said ‘you better exercise some empathy right now, or else’. Felix sighed. “He can stay, but I’m keeping a knife in my room.” 

“Felix, you always keep a knife in your room,” Sylvain said. Sylvain was right. Though Felix wasn’t quite sure how he knew that, and the fact that he did was maybe slightly concerning. “We’ll both be perfectly fine. I bet he’s a gentle giant. You know, like me.” With that, he leaned his elbow on Felix’s head to emphasise their difference in height.

“Oh, shut up.” Felix swatted Sylvain’s arm away, and Sylvain just laughed and ruffled his hair. A couple steps behind them, he heard Dimitri chuckle. Ugh. Whatever Felix had imagined happening tonight, this was way worse. 

They walked through the dark streets of the sleepy little town Felix was sad to call the place he lived. Goddess, it was boring. Him and Sylvain living together was considered ‘gossip’ by these fools. He couldn’t even imagine what the neighbours would say if they saw Dimitri. Not that he cared. No one else was awake at this hour to gossip about them, anyways.

Reaching the house they shared, Felix pulled his keys out, unlocking the door and letting Sylvain in first. As Dimitri stepped up to enter the house, Felix caught him by the shoulder, fixing him with a glare. “Don’t you dare try anything funny,” he growled. 

“Come on, Felix,” Sylvain said, waving Dimitri in. “Sir, you may enter our humble abode.” As he spoke, he bowed with a flourish, and Dimitri chuckled. Felix just watched him, suspicion written in his expression. Sylvain shot him another Look.

Felix followed Dimitri inside, shutting the door and locking it. He shoved his keys deep into his pocket, where he would definitely notice if someone tried to steal them, and then folded his arms. “The shower is upstairs,” he said flatly. “And there’s bread on the kitchen counter if you’re hungry.” There. Now Sylvain couldn’t say he wasn’t being hospitable. 

With that, he went upstairs. He needed to go to bed. This had all been far too exhausting for his liking and the only thing they’d achieved was Sylvain adopting an intimidating man out of an abandoned house. Felix really did have the worst luck.

**Author's Note:**

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